How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb? None. God has predestined when the light will be on. Calvinists do not change light bulbs. They simply read the instructions and pray the light bulb will be the one that has been chosen to be changed.
How many Orthodox does it take to change a light bulb? Change????
How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They always use candles.
How many members of an established Bible teaching church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb? One to actually change the bulb and nine to say how much they liked the old one.
How many liberal neo-orthodox does it take to change a bulb? No one knows. They can’t tell the difference between light and darkness.
How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb? One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
How many Charismatic’s does it take to change a light bulb? One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
How many mainline Protestant Churches does it take to change a light bulb? This statement was issued. “We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relations with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three way, long life, and tinted – all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
How many Tai Chi players does it take to change a light bulb? 100. One to change it and 99 to say: “That’s not the way my teacher does it.
How many youth workers does it take to change a light bulb? Youth workers don’t last long enough for a light bulb to burn out.
// Irène
